HotHands - 2!

I happened to stumble upon one of the things on the right.  After one kid gave it to me.  I think it was a peace offering, but I can't be sure.

It started to heat up, and I kept on touching it to my friends' faces while saying an interesting thing.


Yes, that's what I said.


Then I saw the logo, and it made me think:  that sounds like the name of a cheap movie where the guy was either a firebender, or could light his hands on fire.

Friday Comic: Noose

Happy Thanksgiving!

Hello, everyone!  I would like to wish everyone a happy thanksgiving!  So let's get to together and celebrate English guys in weird suits and native Americans helping each other and eat a huge feast!  Because we're American and that's what we do!  It's so much fun!

You know, taking a U.S. History class has made we wonder why some Indians killed the white men, while some made turkeys for them.  They're very interesting.

And then we tried to kill them all.  Sorry!

Most Common Fears

Here are the 5 most common fears.

1.  Fear of sickness or poor health.

2.  Fear of losing your job

3.  Fear of death

4.  Fear of loneliness

5.  Fear of pilgrims

99.99% of turkeys fear this.

Click to fear the pilgrim.




Happy Thanksgiving.

I HAAAAATE YOOOUUUU......

What really bugs me is when people think they're cooler than me, or other people.  On the left, is an example.  People like this annoy me.  They make themselves look like someone they're not, and it makes me feel sorry for them, until they make me mad.  Everyone likes them, except for my friends and I.

Stupid people who are jerks get on my nerves, too.  I want to kill them.  These are real life experiences.  It's true.

That actually happened today.

The stairs at my school are kind of... broken.

They're each a different size, so naturally, being clumsy and accident-prone, I trip on them often.  It's really embarrassing, so... yeah.  It's annoying when I do trip.  

Stares

At school, I often do things that result in odd stares.  I would like to present my solution to them.

For example, sometimes I sing in the hallway.

Eventually, someone looks over.

And I look back.

Finally, I speak.

They then turn away, and all is well.  After that, I don't have to worry about what they think about, because I really don't care.

Don't you think that stuff often sounds better in your head before you say it?  In cases like this, I usually just laugh.   Faces appear on people, too.

Eventually, I'll just be able to ignore them.

Friday Comic: Immortality

5 Ways to get Fired

Here are the best
5 WAYS TO GET FIRED:

1.  Have fun at a conference meeting.

2.  Laugh at the bubbles in the water cooler.

3.  Play games on your computer.

4.  "Accidentally" break your computer.  (or any other expensive equipment.)

5.  Kill someone.  This is the jackpot!  Not only will you lose your job, you'll go to prison and you'll ruin your life!










If you want to be fired, do these things.  If you don't want to be fired, I advise you don't do these things.  I actually did one of these... and that was a bad idea.  Can you guess which one?

Skiing

I love skiing.  I really do, but it requires a lot of skill.

I went skiing recently, and I learned two very important lessons the hard way.

1.  Don't let stray porcupines leave the trees.

2.  You cannot get distracted by anything; I repeat, ANYTHING while skiing, without it ending in disaster.

I'm going to start with the second rule.  I was skiing through the trees, which, by the way, is really fun.

I looked back for a moment, and here's what happened.

Yes, I hugged the boulder and flipped over the top of it.  Next thing I knew, I was lying in the snow.

The first rule, you may think, is quite strange, and I agree with you.  Let me tell you the story.

 My sister-in-law spotted it first.

This is what we saw:

Okay, yeah, you're probably thinking:  Who cares?  Well, we did.

We decided to pay a visit to our rodent friend.

Turns out it was a porcupine.

And then later...

Sure enough, our little friend (who we named Stanley) was scared to death, trying to escape the constant flow of skiers.  We wanted to help, but there was nothing we could do.  It's not like we could've just jumped off the lift and saved it!

RAINBOW EXPLOSION!!!!!

RAINBOW

EXPLOSION!

Yeah, I know.  It's totally random.  But isn't it awesome?  It's almost as cool as the chair I'm sitting in.  You know, the one that numbs my butt.

See the frowning asain?  He's mad.  He also has enormous nostrils

Now we flip the image vertically...

Now we get a smiling bald guy.  Isn't that the best?  I think it's awesome.

That's all I have to say today.  In case you couldn't tell, I'm feeling weird today.